Dear Norm,

I just hate you. I hate to watch your show every weekend. You can tell how much I hate you because I never miss a show. When I get up on Saturday I can't wait to hate watching your show. I've hated you and your show for years now. I hate spending all those hours thinking about that workshop of yours full of all those great tools and wiping the drool from my lip. I hate watching you cut two pieces of wood that turn out to be the same size. I hate how you start out to build a chair and end up with a chair. I start to build a chair and end up with a bird house. A bird house that no self respecting bird would live in.

Please keep up the good work so I can continue hating you and your show.

Sam Adkins

P.S. My wife hates your show too. We hate it every weekend together.